Found a nice little cove where nobody else goes
Took a trip 'round the Caves of Drach
And said 'It's good to explore the more cultural aspects'.
Hedley Verityesque, she passed into folklore
Trod on the lines in the pavement
And said 'There's no room for enigmas in built-up areas'.
Sweats who think they're hard, sweats who think they're hard
My head no end do in, head no end do in
Brakes fail in the rain down memory lane
Come re-live my paper round with me.
And I don't see any more, I don't see any more pent up Alsatians
They used to wait by the door
And say 'It's nice to know you're here, it's nice to know you're here'.
And I don't want any more, I don't want any more stark German film noirs
And I could well do without
The handclapping sequence at the end of Blockbusters.
You were in my hall, now you're on my wall
Peter Sarstedt, Mister Irony - get in the hole.
In some warm lagoon, in some warm lagoon
I'll be with Ayshea soon, be with Ayshea soon
Brakes fail in the rain down memory lane
Come re-live my paper round with me.
And I don't see any more, I don't see any more big mad Alsatians
They used to wait by the door
And sing 'It's nice to know you're here, it's nice to know you're here'.
And I don't need any more, I don't need any more stark German film noirs
And I could well do without
The handclapping sequence at the end of Blockbusters
When all of the audience try to convince themselves
And the only thing I can say is 'Oh Kip Keino'.