Don't want to be a Canadian idiot
Don’t want to be some beer swillin' hockey nut
And do I look like some frost bitten hosehead?
I never learned my alphabet from "A" to "Zed"
They all live on donuts and moose meat
And they leave the house without packin' heat
Never even bring their guns to the mall
And you know what else is too funny?
Their stupid monopoly money-y
Can't take 'em seriously at
Well maple syrup and snow's what they export
They treat curling just like it's a real sport
They think their silly accent is so cute
Can't understand a thing they're talking a-boot
Sure they got their national health care
Cheaper meds, low crime rates, and clean air-r
Then again well they got Celine Di-on
Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni
And dream of driving a zamboni-i
All over Sas-ka-tchew-an
Don't want to be a Canadian idiot
Won't figure out the temperature in Celcius
See the map they're hovering right over us
N.C.
Always hear the same kind of story
Break their nose and they'll just say sorry-y
Tell me what kind of freaks are that polite?
It's gotta mean they're all up to something
So quick before they see it coming-g
Time for a pre-emptive strike