Well I heard you've been wonderin
How I'm gettin' along.
I guess you think I can't make it
With you gone.
Well I don't want you to worry
Don't you lose any sleep
But a man called long distance this mornin
Said they're thinkin' bout puttin' me
On the cover of USA Today,
A story of heartbreak and pain.
A picture of the lonliest man, they claim,
In the USA Today.
Well I don't sleep in the night time,
Darkness reminds me of you.
I lost eight pounds since last Tuesday,
But I can stand to lose a few.
I don't believe I'm too bad,
People say I look fine.
The man from the papers seems happy,
Says I'm bigger than the latest crime.
On the cover of USA Today,
A story of heartbreak and pain.
A picture of the lonliest man, they claim,
In the USA Today.
So if you're concerned and troubled,
Think you're hurtin' me?
Don't you worry, 'cause this little thing called losin' you
Has made a big man out of me.
I'm on the cover of USA Today,
A story of heartbreak and pain.
A picture of the lonliest man, they claim,
In the USA Today.