I've always been the guy with the finger in his nose
When the passport picture gets taken
When the big guys took me out stealing chickens
It was me caught holding the bacon
When they're dropping a piano from the forty seventh floor
I'm the guy underneath a looking up
And when the tidal wave strikes a hundred miles at sea
I'm always at the rail throwing up
Whee, KER-Pow!
Somehow I woulda met you anyhow
You fix it up and then holy cow
You folks should oughta see me now
I was standing in the artsy-fartsy uptown restaurant a few frozen dinners ago