He sleeps out there, out where the coyotes wail,
The reason he ain't at the bar with the boys,
Makes quite a dismal tale
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me,
He oughtn't-a, shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, no siree.
You don't get many callers,
Sleeping on the lone prairie.
But he shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me.
verse 1
Way out West we're wild and wooly,
We're tall grown, all grown,
All the men are hairy-chested,
And all the women, double-breasted.
We're lady-like until molested,
And then we're on our own!
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me,
He oughtn't-a shouldn't-a hadn't-a felt so free.
His wife gets the insurance,
And I'm sorry as can be,
But he shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me.
verse 2
This here job is mighty tryin',
Sometimes the room is fairly flyin' with
High-balls, eye-balls.
One got killed, somebody got 'im,
Tore up the joint from top to bottom.
I think I was that one that shot him,
As near as I recall.
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me,
He massacred eight or nine men at the Lazy "B".
He then took on the sheriff, and the sheriff's deputy,
But he shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me.
verse 3
All you boys remember Harry,
The wrangler I was set to marry,
A long man, strong man.
One night he yells, "I'm from Texas!"
And socks me in my solar plexus.
Well having normal, good reflexes,
I knocked him on his can!
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a blacked my eye,
I'm really a lovable, peaceable kind of guy.
I wouldn't scare a rabbit, and I couldn't harm a flea,
But he shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me.
Music 1
If this story has a moral,
It's: When you're looking for a quarrel or
Show Down. "Slow down."
If by now, you haven't mastered,
The gentle art of getting plastered,
You're just a Low-Down, you ain't mastered,
The motto of our town!
You shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a start no fight,
Our burying ground is a most impressive sight.
The message on them tombstones is as simple as can be,
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me,
He shouldn't-a, hadn't-a, oughtn't-a swang on me!