We were all drinking at Marge's one night
When an old cowboy came through the door
He took a few shaky steps
Then he started to moan
And he keeled over right on the floor
Doc came on over, took his stethoscope out
He listened and he looked in his eyes
He said, "boys, stick around
I just might need your help
I'm afraid this will be a long night"
Cause, there's a five gallon tear, a five gallon tear
Lodged in this poor old boy's heart
By the look in his eyes he ain't cried in years
And he's retaining a five gallon tear
Doc wrote a prescription to induce him to cry
It was whiskey and sad country songs
We propped him up in a booth
Poured a drink down his throat
Then we turned that old Wurlitzer on
Well he spluttered and he coughed
And he hung down his head
As those lonely songs worked on his heart
When the memories started coming six minutes apart
We laid him face up on the bar
Then a five gallon tear, a five gallon tear
Slowly welled up in his eyes
We all yelled "push" and we all gave a cheer
When he cried that five gallon tear
That jar by the door, don't hold pig feet no more
The contents are sparkling clear
That liquid within is not moonshine or gin
It's a reminder to everyone here
It's a five gallon tear, a five gallon tear
Let this be a lesson to you
If you sorrow inside for too many years
Then you'll cry the five gallon tear
Buddy you'll cry
Buddy, you'll cry a five gallon tear.