You should stay away from roses
And be careful to avoid chocolate hearts
Keep distant from romantic notions
?cause that's where love most often starts
Be sure to steer clear of diamonds
You know you've always been the sort
Who's truly only fond of the sport
And who would never be satisfied
Reclining in slippers by the fireside
With a wife's constant nagging
For things that you can't provide
Who no longer bears resemblance
To that soft spoken flower
You were so desperate to have for your bride
Too much conversing with a woman
Tends to dull a man's wit
Never be taken in by poets