You ain?t Dolly and you ain?t Porter
She?s a little bit fuller yeah well you?re a whole lot shorter
Let?s dance all night and fill the jukebox full of quarters
Cos you ain?t Dolly no and you ain?t Porter
I noticed you right off the bat in them cowboy boots
Who couldn't help but see you in that rhinestone suit
That's cause I'm the reigning queen of karaoke night
Well if I get drunk enough to sing hell I just might
Hey now don't you worry cowboy cause I'll get you through
We'll sing a cheating song just like they used to do
You ain?t Dolly and you ain?t Porter
She?s a little bit fuller yeah well you?re a whole lot shorter
Let?s dance all night and fill the jukebox full of quarters
Cos you ain?t Dolly no and you ain?t Porter
You'll probably see me country singing on The Voice someday
Yeah and I'm the guy they wrote about in 50 Shades of Grey
Why don't you come on back to my place and you can have your way
Well baby that sounds tempting but I just can't stay
Oh we won first prize cowboy let's just split the dough
Honey I will always love you but we'll never know
Cause you ain't Dolly babe you ain't no Porter
She's a little bit fuller and you're a damn sight shorter
We danced all night and filled the jukebox full of quarters
Cause you ain't Dolly and you ain't Porter no
No you ain't Dolly no you ain't Porter