I'm glad I weren't no pioneer
Riding in a wagon cross the great frontier
I'm playing by candlelight, power's out here
And I can't watch TV
I can't do nothing, nothing at all
Everything comes from a switch on the wall
Drives me nuts when it won't behave
No popcorn from the microwave
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
Sky's real nice
Moon's real big
Star's real bright
Cable calls and it don't seem right
That I can't watch TV
And it breaks my heart, all I'm missing
Bowling shoes, old guys fishing
How the dogs on the track did
Near death stuff, re-enacted
Where to call to talk to strangers
Interviews with hockey players
How to lose a pound a minute
Make big bucks, be rolling in it
Shopping clubs, gladiators
Cher's make-up, roller skaters
Rhinestone studs in your new skirt
Bald guy stuff, psychic network
Don't you feel bad for me
That I can't watch TV
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
Sky's real nice
Moon's real big
Star's real bright
Cable calls and it don't seem right
That I can't watch TV
Cable calls and it don't seem right
That I can't watch TV