Punch, Punch and Judy, Punch and Judy, Punch and Judy
Washing machine, pinstripe dream, stripped the gloss from a beauty queen
Punch and Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy
Found our nest in The Daily Express, met the vicar in a holy vest
Punch and Judy, Punch and Judy
Brought up the children Church of E, now I vegetate with a colour TV
Worst ever thing that ever happened to me, oh for D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
Oh, Judy
What ever happened to pillow fights?
What ever happened to jeans so tight, Friday nights
What ever happened to Lover's Lane?
What ever happened to passion games, Sunday walks in the pouring rain?
Punch, punch, punch the Judy, punch, punch, punch the Judy
Punch, punch, punch the Judy, punch, punch, punch
Curling tongs, Mogadons, "I got a headache, baby, don't take so long"
Single beds, middle age dread, losing the war in the waistlands spread
"Who left the cap off the toothpaste tube? Who forgot to flush the loo?
Leave your sweaty socks outside the door, don't walk across my polished floor"
Oh, Judy
Whatever happened to morning smiles?
Whatever happened to wicked wiles, permissive styles?
Whatever happened to twinkling eyes?
Whatever happened to hard fast drives, compliments on unnatural size?
Punch, punch, punch the Judy, punch, punch, punch the Judy
Punch, punch, punch the Judy, punch, punch, punch
Propping up a bar, family car, sweating out a mortgage as a balding clerk
Punch and Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy
World War Three, suburbanshee, just slip her these pills and I'll be free
No more Judy, Judy, Judy no more
Goodbye Judy