Mama got a call from the principal's office
Better get down here fast
Her mama didn't know she was nine months late
Been getting on her about gaining weight
And now she's a grandma
Somebody had a baby
Somebody had a breakdown
Aaah, it's a big day
In a small town
Well, Eddie Smith swore he wouldn't miss one more
Of Junior's football games
Juniors in the endzone half back pitch
Willie's sitting upside down in a ditch
And the crowd goes wild
Somebody wrecked a pick up
Somebody scored a touchdown
Aaah, it's a big day
In a small town
There ain't no mall
No waffle house
Around here
Somebody shot a deer
Somebody's getting married
Or buried
The sun comes up
And the sun goes down
Aaah, it's a big day
In a small town
Women go around about a Methodist man
And a jail bait check out queen
She left all the chicken in the frying pan
And threw all the kids in a grand caravan
With a baseball bat
Somebody went to Wal-mart
In nothing but a night gown
Aaah, it's a big day
In a small town
There ain't no mall
No waffle house
Around here
Somebody shot a deer
Somebody's getting married
Or buried
The sun comes up
And the sun goes down
Aaah, it's a big day
Hey, in a small town