I can make anybody pretty, I can make you believe any lie
I can make you pick a fight with somebody twice your size
I've been known to cause a few breakups
I've been known to cause a few births
I can make you new friends or get you fired from work
(Chorus 1)
And since the day I left Milwaukee, Lynchburg and Bordeaux France
I've been making the bars lots of big money
And helping white people dance
I got you in trouble in High School, but college now that was a ball
You had some of the best times you'll never remember with me
Alcohol! Alcohol!
I got blamed at your wedding reception
For your best man?s embarrassing speech
And also for those naked pictures of you at the beach
I've influenced kings and world leaders
I helped Hemmingway write like he did
And I'll bet you a drink or two that I can make you
Put that lamp shade on your head
(Chorus 2)
Cause since the day I left Milwaukee, Lynchburg and Bordeaux France
I've been making a fool out of folks just like you
And helping white people dance
I am medicine and I am poison I can help you up or make you fall
You had some of the best times you'll never remember with me
Alcohol!
(Repeat Chorus 1)