Hey, Merry Christmas, Adam!
Merry Christmas, Fred!
On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
A partridge in a pear tree
I don't even know what a partridge is, to be honest
A partridge is a bird
So, on the, on the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me two turtle doves
And a partridge in a pear tree
Turtle doves?
They're nice
But, on the third day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three French hens
Two turtle doves
And a partridge in a pear tree
From now on can you sing
"And a Danny Bonaduce"?
On the fourth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtle doves
And a Danny Bonaduce
That's good!
Yeah, yeah, it works, the syllables
Yeah, so I started to wonder
If my true love, my old lady
And on the fifth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Five golden rings
Nice!
Yeah, I was finally happy
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtle doves
And a Danny Bonaduce
So, like, with the five golden rings
That's kinda nice
But, on the sixth day
It kinda went downhill
On the seventh day?
Seventh day
On the eight day it got really weird
Cause on the eight day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Eight maids a-milking
What?!
I think they're like lactating or something
I don't get that
But, on the ninth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Nine ladies dancing
Nice! Okay, cool
On the tenth day it got crazy again
Cause she gave me ten lords a -leaping
And then the eleventh day
Pipers piping
But, on the twelfth day of Christmas
This is the last day
My true love gave to me
Twelve drummers drumming
Everybody could use a good drummer
So, let's go down the list
And finish this godforsaken song off
Twelve drummers drumming
Eleven pipers piping
Ten lords a-leaping
Nine ladies dancing
Let's give it up for the ladies dancing
Eight maids a-milking
Seven swans a-swimming
Six geese a-laying
Five golden rings
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtle doves
And a Danny Bonaduce
Merry Christmas!