Satan gave me a taco and it made me really sick
The chicken was all raw and the grease was mighty thick
The rice was all rancid and the beans were so hard
I was getting kinda dizzy eatin' all the lard
There was aphids on the lettuce and I ate every one
And after I was done the salsa melted off my tongue
Pieces of tortilla got stuck in my throat
And the stains on my clothes burned a hole through my coat
My stomach was tremblin' and I broke out in a rash
I was so dry and thirsty and I didn't have no cash
So I went and found a hose tore off all my clothes
Turned on the water and it shot right up my nose
Some old lady came along and she flat out was a freak
So she beat me with her handbag 'til I could hardly speak
I was lying there naked my body badly bruised
In a pool of my own blood unconscious and confused
When the cops came and got me and threw me in their van
And I woke up on the ceiling and I couldn't find my hand
They took me to the judge his eyes were glowing red
The courtroom was filled with witches and the dead
The sheriff was a hell-hound with fangs and claws
The prisoners were tied up and chained to the walls
The air was getting thick the smoke was getting thicker
The judge read the verdict said Cut off his head
Well they placed me on the altar they raised up the axe
My head was about to explode when I noticed the Marshall stacks
I noticed all the smoke machines cameras and lights
Some guy with a microphone runnin' around dancin' in tights and I noticed
The crew and the band playin' down below
And I realized I was in a rock 'n' roll video
So I went and joined the band and I went out on tour
And I smoked a lot of heroin and I passed out in manure
I made out with the groupies started fires backstage
Made a lot of money and I gave it all away
Well the band got killed so I started a solo career
And I won all the awards and I drank all the beer
I opened up a taco stand just to smell the smell
Cookin' with the devil, fryin' down in hell