Key: G
Introduction:
Gm C7 Am7 D7 Gm Gm7/D C/E C7
Verse 1
F F6 F7M F6
Freda and Barry sat one night,
G G6 G7 G G6
The sky was clear, the stars were bright,
Gm C7 Am7 D7
The wind was soft, the moon was up,
Gm Gm7/D C/E C7
Freda drained her cocoa cup!
Verse 2
F F6 F7M F6
She licked her lips, she felt sub - lime,
G G6 G7 G G6
She switched off 'Gardeners Quest - ion Time',
Gm C7 Am7 D7
Barry cringed in fear and dread,
Gm Gm7/D C/E C7
As Freda grabbed his tie, and said...
Verse 3
F F/C F F/C
Let's do it, let's do it,
F F/C C7 C7/G
Do it while the mood is right,
C7 C7/G C7 C7/G
I'm feeling ...ap - pealing,
F F/C F7
I've really got an appe - tite,
Bb G#º/B
I'm on fire ...with desire,
F/C D7
I could handle half the tenors in a male voice choir,
G7 C7 F F/C F
Let's do it, let's do it to - night!
Verse 4
F F/C F F/C
...I can't do it, I can't do it,
F F/C C7 C7/G
I don't believe in too much sex,
C7 C7/G C7 C7/G
This fashion ...for passion,
F F/C F7
Turns us into nervous wrecks,
Bb G#º/B
No derision, my decision,
F/C D7
I'd rather watch 'The Spinners' on the television,
G7 C7 F F/C F
I can't do it, I can't do it to - night!
Verse 5
F F/C F F/C
...Let's do it, let's do it,
F F/C C7 C7/G
Do it 'til our hearts go boom,
Bb G#º/B
This folly ...is jolly,
F/C D7
Bend me over backwards on m' 'Hostess Trolley',
G7 C7 F F/C F
Let's do it, let's do it to - night!
Verse 6
F F/C F F/C
...I can't do it, I can't do it,
F F/C C7 C7/G
Me 'eavy breathing days have gone,
C7 C7/G C7 C7/G
I'm older, feel colder,
F F7
It's other things that turn me on,
Bb G#º/B
I'm imploring, I'm boring,
F/C D7
Let me read this catalogue on vinyl flooring,
G7 C7 F
I can't do it, I can't do it to - night!
KEY CHANGE - Verse 7
G G/D G G/D
Let's do it, let's do it,
G G/D D7 D7/A
Have a crazy night of love,
D7 D7/A D7 D7/A
I'll strip bare, I'll just wear...
G G7
...Sti - lettos and an oven glove,
C Bbº
Don't starve a ...girl of a palaver,
G/D E7
Dangle from the wardrobe in your Balaclava,
A7 D7 G
Let's do it, let's do it to - night!
Verse 8
G G/D G G/D
...I can't do it, I can't do it,
G G/D D7 D7/A
I know I'd only get it wrong,
D7 D7/A D7 D7/A
Don't angle ...for me to dangle,
G G7
Me arms 'ave never been that strong,
C Bbº
Stop pouting, stop shouting,
G/D E7
You know I pulled a muscle when I did that grouting,
A7 D7 G
I can't do it, I can't do it to - night!
Verse 9
G G/D G G/D
Let's do it, let's do it,
G G/D D7 D7/A
Share a night of wild ro - mance,
D7 D7/A D7 D7/A
Fre - netic, ...po - etic,
G G7
This could be your last big chance...
C Bbº
...To quote Milton, to eat Stilton,
G/D E7
To roll in gay abandon on the 'Tufted Wilton',
A7 D7 G
Let's do it, let's do it to - night!
KEY CHANGE - verse 1
Ab
I can't do it, I can't do it,
Ab Eb7
I've other little jobs on hand,
Eb7
Don't grouse...a - round the house,
Ab Ab7
I've got a busy evening planned,
Db Bº/D
Stop nagging, I'm flagging,
Ab F7
You know, as well as I do, that the pipes want lagging,
Bb7 Eb7 Ab
I can't do it, I can't do it to - night!
Ab
Let's do it, let's do it,
Ab Eb7
While I'm really in the mood,
Eb7
Three cheers,
Eb7 Ab Ab7
...It's years since I caught you even semi - nude,
Db Bº/D
Be drastic, gymnastic,
Ab F7
Wear your baggy Y-fronts with the loose elastic,
Bb7 Eb7 Ab
But... let's do it, let's do it to - night!
verse 1
Ab
I can't do it, I can't do it,
Ab Eb7
I must refuse to get un - dressed,
Eb7
I feel silly,
Eb7 Ab Ab7
It's too chilly to go without m' thermal vest,
Db Bº
Don't choose me, don't use me,
Ab F7
Me' mother sent a note to say you must excuse me,
Bb7 Eb7 Ab
I can't do it, I can't do it to - night!
KEY CHANGE - verse 1