Key: G
Introduction: G D A7 D
D G D
Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are pickin' at your local saloon
G D A7
They got a new song out on Polish Records, it'll be a Polish hit real soon
D G D
They picked every honky-tonk and bar from here to Timbuktu
G D A7 D
Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are bustin' their butts for you
D G D
Out where the cars are up on blocks and the houses are on wheels
G D A7
Slim and a big time bookin' agent, they cooked up a hell of a deal
D G D
They'd pick every Wal-Mart parkin' lot across the USA
G D A7 D
If the Good Lord's willin' and the creek don't rise and they figure out how to get paid
G(let D
No Chance was the only chance the Playboys ever had
A7
No matter how they picked 'em, everything they played was bad
D G D
Then Slim come along and he played the songs that stick right in your head
G D A7 D
Slim Chance and the Can't Hardly Playboys are really a-knockin' 'em dead
SOLO
D G D
Esmeralda Muckinfuch was Slim's good timin' gal
G D A7
She wasn't much to look at but Slim loved her anyhow
D G D
You couldn't beat her when she's sober, but you had to when she's drunk
G D A7 D
We all called her the Country Kitty, 'cause she smelled just like a what in the world was that?
G(let D
Slim Chance could be anyone who hangs out in a bar
A7
Or any local yokel who sings and plays guitar
D G D
All the boys and girls around the world now they know who they are
G D A7 D
Slim Chance is about the best chance that they got to be a star
D G D
Yesterday I couldn't even spell star, and now I are one
G D
I say I ain't but a star I are
A7
Do they not know who we think we are?
I'm tellin' ya we're gonna get 500 a gig or we ain't playin!
D
I think we need some of them w * * *es dejours
G D
And some of them carrots and other things people get in back of the stage
G D
We need some of them little sausages on toothpicks, maybe a dressing room (that'd be good)