Key: C
Introduction:
Am
Doesn't have a problem with drugs,
Dm
He just doesn't do them,
G
He's fine that his mates have tattoos,
Am
But he reckon's they'll rue them,
Am
He likes going to pubs,
Dm
But he hates it when the music's too loud,
G
He tends not to go to rock concerts,
Am
'Cause he can't stand the crowd
Dm G
And all he's ever wanted to be
C G/B Am C/G
Is a rock star on RAGE or MTV,
Dm G
But he knows that it's not very likely,
E
He just turned thirty
E Am
He will always be
G
A rock'n'roll nerd,
C C/E
He'll keep writing songs the world will never hear,
Am C/E
And though the won't be heard
Dm/F Em
He'll keep on writing, oh yeah,
D Gm
But you see the problem is
C7 F
He always dreamt of being a star
A#7 Eb
But he learnt piano instead of guitar,
D Gm
Which in the nineties didn't get you very far,
C7 F
So while the other kids were learning Stairway
A#7 Eb
He was the piano to their forte,
D
But he was convinced one day
Eb
He'd rock their fucking arses,
D Eb
Or be an icon for the disenfranchised masses,
D Eb
Grow his hair long and rebel against the state,
Eb F
But for now that'd have to wait,
D G
'Cause he's running late for his morning classes.
Am
And he will always be
G
A rock'n'roll nerd,
C C/E
He'll keep playing gigs that no-one knows about,
Am C
And though it sounds absurd
Dm Em
He'll just keep playing, oh yeah,
D Gm
But you see the problem is
C7 F
There's not much depth in what he's singing,
A#7 Eb
He's a victim of his upper-middle class upbringing,
D
So he can't write about the 'hood, or bling-bling,
Gm C7 F
So he sits and imagines his girlfriend is dead
A#7 Eb
To try to evoke some angst in his middle class head,
D
But the bitch is always fine at half past nine when they
C7 F
He hasn't spent a single night in prison,
A#7 Eb
He has no issues with nutrition,
D Eb
He has no drinking problem and no drug addiction
D Eb
Unless you count the drugs they put in chicken,
D Eb
Marijuana always tends to make him cough,
F
He doesn't look good with his t-shirt off,
D
And when he tries to act tough, you can tell he's
G
Tricking.
Vocal riffing
C
While his mates all stay out late,
Eb F
Popping pills and havin fun,
C
He stays home and showers,
And gets a good eight hours,
Eb F
He gets his thrills from his morning run,
C
While his mates all go on dates,
Eb F
Taking speed and drinking cans of Jim Beam,
C
He stays home and cooks,
And curls up with a book,
Eb F
And the girl he's had since he was seventeen
Gm
'Cause he's never really been part of the scene,
A#7
While the other kids liked Gunners he liked Queen,
C7
He's more into Beatles than the Stones,
Bb
He's more Stevie Wonder than Ramones,
Gm
And he never owned a panel van,
A#
He never shot a Sepultura fan,
C7
He doesn't know the difference between metal and thrash,
Eb F
He couldn't tell you nothing about Axl and Slash,
Gm
He likes Ben Folds and The Jackson Five,
A#7
He knows all the words to Stayin' Alive,
C7
And though he wants to be all grungy and cool
Eb F
He spent eleven years in motherf *ckr private school,
Gm
So it doesn't matter how hard he tries,
A#7
He cannot hide behind his rock'n'roll lies,
C7
'Cause you've either got it or you don't,
Eb F
Yeah, you'll either rock it or you won't,
Gm A#7
You've either got it or you don't,
C7 F
Yeah, you'll either rock it or you wont.
Am
He knows that his music lacks depth
Dm
But it just can't be helped
G
He has nothing interesting to say
Am
So he writes about himself
Am
But he doesn't want to seem self-obsessed
Dm
So he writes in third person
G
In an attempt to sound more rock n roll
Am
But he suspects it's not working
Dm G
And deep in his heart he knows
C C/E Am
he'll never be Bono, or