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Before the land before time, there was a time before land
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When the world was just slime, and Krongu was the brand
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Yes Krongu green sludge was the popular item
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There might have been better sludges, but no-one ever tried 'em
Verse
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Bought and sold by the platter, green slime by Krongu
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It was the most popular matter, it was the most popular hue
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It was from sea to sea, it was from dawn to dark
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It had thoroughly cornered all of the market
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All other colours were in absentia back in BC ten zillion
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There was no puce or magenta or chartreuse or cerulean
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No red, yellow or blue, well to put it properly
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There was green slime by Krongu, it was a total monopoly
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If you'd bought stock in there oh for a while it would have sky-rocketed
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It would have been mucho deniro that you would have stood to have pocketed
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But if you missed out on that ship then you have my sympathies kid
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Cos Krongu's value dipped as those slimy seas did
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And land started to pop-up in dribs and drabs at a time
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And creatures started to hop-up from the oceans of slime
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Krongu's grip started slipping with this slew of innovations
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There was now competition from some new corporations
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There were so many styles, and it all seemed so nice
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These millions of aisles of life's merchandise
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Some tiny, some giant, some could chirp some could buzz
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Rebellious or compliant, with scales, feathers or fuzz
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Some were stupid as turnips, some were lowly as corals
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Some had high-minded concepts, dreams and ideas and morals
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Some were fanged, some were toothless, some were sweet, some were salty
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They were popular but useless, they were pretty but faulty
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Yes I guess I got fleeced, I got baited and hooked
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By each dream and each beast that didn't work as good as it looked
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'cos each one crapped out and broke. Built to last? forget it
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Get a refund? that's a joke, you can't even exchange for store credit
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Someone do some muck-raking, an expose, a news tip-off
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This whole store is a heartbreaking, fraudulent rip-off
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Forget friends, family, dreams, hearts, trees, birds, dogs, snakes
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Forget you, forget me, it's just cheap stuff that breaks
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And in the land after time, and the time after land
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They'll just roll-out the slime in the most trusted brand
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When push comes to shove it'll be Krongu. No dismissals, no disbarments
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No more tears, no more love, no more crew of disposable varmints
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'Cos before the land before time, there was a time before land
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When the world was just slime and Krongu was the brand
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Yes Krongu green sludge, was the popular item
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There might have been better sludges, but no-one ever tried 'em
Outro
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